I was cleaning out the garage recently and found a stack of old journals and notebooks from my teenage and college years. I wrote a lot of poetry back then. It was my outlet because I didn’t feel like I had anyone in my family to talk to. By the time I was 12, my parents were divorced and each back on the dating scene and my sister and brother were both already off to college. Needless to say, I spent a lot of time alone from age 12-18.

I started my first journal in 1991 – my sophomore year of high school. I find some of the entries absolutely hilarious filled with who my crush-of-the-week was, tales of sports adventures and the usual overdose of teenage angst. I imagine the entries would be quite boring to anyone else so I’ll spare retyping them here. Although if I do find some particularly funny ones, I may post them.

In between the entries was all the poetry. Again, filled will all the who-cares teenage drama, but one thing I didn’t remember from more than 30 years ago – I started writing erotica back then – at age 14!

Some of these I WOULD like to share with you.

I had quite the imagination, especially for someone that hadn’t even had sex yet. That came the year later at age 15.

Rereading these myself I am transported back into my teenage brain – emotional, chaotic, very much not fully formed and for sure trying to seem clever with over complicated word choices. So you may read these and think they are cheesy, and yes they are, but I can also see a flicker. This light that has developed into what is now my Big Bang of sexual and emotional awakening that started nearly seven years ago now. So silly or not, I hope you enjoy reading the erotica of a 14 year old!

Poem #6
With half-closed eyes, my mouth drops
I wait for the night to fall
As your creeping hand drips down my leg
Actions dance on my mind
Your liquid melts me
Now it’s easy to forget my fear
The dark hides me from reality.

Poem #17
Your sun illuminates my body
And I feel so warm
When you shine
That my body glistens
As droplets slither down my neck
And run past mountains
Of spirit and desire.
And your image
Haunts my daily thoughts
And nightly desires.
To touch my moist lips to your chest
Is an ever-growing fantasy
I wish to fulfill
During a nightly encounter.
You have been torturing me for too long.
You have bound me with your chains and shackles
Taunting me with your hands.
Yet you never get close enough for me to…

Poem #32
I ache for you to clench my shoulders
Within your fists hard
And slam me against a wall in agony
My urges being executed.
I want to get next to you.
I know what is in your mind.
I want it, pain.
This desire eats my insides
Like an acid your might
Pour down my throat.
Cleave me bare.
Madly run your hands over me.
I can feel you hot inside of me.
You blind me with fire
Burning me to a pinnacle
Working your natural fetish.
I glisten from this thing.
A droplet snaking over the cliff down to the plains.
There is no turning back
After your words and acts.
Tomorrow I’d like to be you.

Poem #46
You know my guts.
I’m so full of you
It runs down my chest and over my ribs.
The more you’re wrong
The more I want you.
When we’re alone
I can’t talk
For fear you would say a word
That would make my longing body
Explode.
Everyone says I can’t have you.
I know I shouldn’t.
I have to have you one night.
Alone.
Tomorrow.
Don’t talk to me.